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Keys With Kristin – Make it to 80 Rules to Live By

Technology is amazing. It has allowed us to connect across the globe, work from home, build an empire, or find a mate. It can also show you what you’d look like at age 80!! 

Recently, we had a talk about age at our office. What if you make it to 80? What are you doing today to support that person? What are you building for her or him? What are you worried about today that won’t matter in 50 years, 5 years or 5 months from now? This sparked and resonated with me in a deep way as I look back on the last 37 years. What have we all been focusing on and what do you plan to focus on next?  

I remember spending a ton of time worrying in my teens and 20s. What to wear? What to buy? What car would I drive? What did “they” think of me? How do I get paid more to pay off these student loans? How in the world do I afford daycare? We’re going to have to eat Spam until payday. We’re never going to make it. Will I ever lose the baby weight? Will I ever get “there”?  

I have the immense privilege to serve a clientele that is in their retirement years, and I find it enlightening that maybe, just maybe, we all spend too much time worrying about the wrong things. As these individuals age, they speak of things like time, people, and health. Contrary to my field of finance, they do not talk about money, status, or power. This has been invaluable for me and my family as we learn the process of what matters most to us.  

Age is just a number, and so is the amount of your net worth. Weight is a measure of your body mass. Twenty-four hours is a measure of your time allotted every day.  All are important. How you use them all will calculate your lifespan.  

Ways to expand your lifespan: 

  1. Let go of what everyone thinks of you. Some people DO matter. The immediate circle you surround yourself with should have an opinion on your actions, and you should consider it. But honestly, how many likes you get online will not make your self-worth increase. Perseverating on the opinion of others can bring on so much stress and prevent you from stepping into your real self. Maybe you need to focus on what you really want in your life, who you want in it. Who will you be at age 80? Will you look back then and say “man, I should have worn a pantsuit more?” I won’t. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you’ll be criticized anyway.” I must admit this one is and has been a big one for me. To combat the first response, I found that if I am clear on my goals and vision for my life it will cloud out the opinions of others. That will lead to a better and happier life.  
  1. Focus on solutions. Problems will come and go with the seasons. Pandemics, death, job loss, marriage ending, an injury, or an ice storm. Any time we’re faced with a problem we have two choices: wallow in the problem or find a solution. This has been not only valuable in my overall happiness but also has helped build my career. I too, want to throw a pity party (and I still will) but for the majority of the time I will choose to look for a way out. I believe we are inundated with negativity. Turn on any TV channel, and you will see the news screaming the horrors of the world. The famous news saying, “if it bleeds, it leads”, is the cancer of our society. Focusing on how we’re spending our days on solutions will breed positivity, but also confidence in being better. As a person, I can solve this issue. I’ve built my own self-confidence, but what if the media portrayed how our leaders and our world was focusing on solutions? Wouldn’t that be a different world? It doesn’t mean there wouldn’t be problems…or catastrophic tornadoes, but the VUE Magazine proved that focusing on the solutions, our community brought a town back to life, saved individuals from homelessness, and spread the word of Christianity to broken individuals in church parking lots. That is solution-based thinking.  
  1. Money is not the most important thing. Don’t get me wrong, I love money. 😊 It’s my livelihood. But I have also watched retired multi-millionaires be miserable. Trust me when I tell you that money doesn’t make people happy. There are holes of loneliness, missed time, and opportunity. At age 80, I have never had an individual say, “if I had more money, I’d be happier.” Now, it could make life easier, sure. Money provides the tools in which our goals and dreams are built. The happiest and most successful retirees prove that money is necessary. If you create good habits around money, it is always a thought but never a worry. Earn money in a way that brings you joy, save from your earnings to make your future self able to enjoy your later years, and don’t waste it on things that you are buying to impress people you don’t like. Our society and media have now made money about what you can buy instead of what you can impact. Think on that, what would you do with your money if you were not obsessed with buying things? How much easier would your life be?  
  1. Focus on today. This 24 hours right now is all we have. I know this one all too well. In 2011, I lost my dad to cancer. He was 59. Only 1 year retired. Now, I had a huge blessing, I believe, in knowing well in advance that he would die (solution thinking). The blessing was the time I spent with him in his last year. He made sure to tell me life lessons and critical jokes I couldn’t forget. I spent time telling him what he meant to me, and how much I loved him. I made sure his one and only grandson was with him, and we took so many videos. I made sure his egg yolk was the perfect slightly runny and his toast was never burnt but must be slightly brown. There were so many days I’ve wasted thinking about the past or the future. Don’t you? You forget what is right in front of you. What if you only had today left? What if we all followed Tim McGraw’s advice and lived like you were dying?  

Age 80 may or may not happen for you. I hope it does, but mostly I hope you understand that YOU hold the power to your happiness. You can spend a lifetime trying to please others, wallow in your problems, live in greed, and worry about the future. Or you could spend the next 24 hours turning off the news, turning on your brain, and building the relationships and life you want.

IN THE VUE

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